I love you. At least I think I do.
These doubts you have. They are many. Would that I could paint you a perfect expanse, a perfect universe! You want perfection. When I say no one is perfect, you say, you don’t want perfection- but you do.
Your heart often says more than your lips.
I can feel the panic leaping through layers of skin, experience, scars, insecurity, and the uncertainty of all that you cannot predict or prevent.
I would ask that you forget. Close the curtain on all past hurts and wrongs, and tell you that the God in me is enough for both of us.
But I am not sure you’d understand. It’s no simple matter.
So my heart aches for the little boy inside you who worries that the world is worse than it appears.
I weep for the person you could be if you trusted a little more; trusted that God does not simply keep a bird’s eye view on you, but is a part of your DNA, and has placed such greatness in you.
I pray for the day you will smile with neither shadows in your heart nor your eyes.
Let God be your best friend.
I pray God will be the only footprint you leave wherever you set foot.
And that the true unconditional love you’re afraid to hope for is exactly what steals your heart and keeps it.
Yours is a heart that cares deeply,
yours is a heart that hits like a fist I can’t come back from.
But I pray more than all things that you come to see that the kind of love you seek, Christ has already given you, and that is you opened your incredible eyes a tad wider, and your mind a lot more, and had faith as that of a mustard seed, clarity would be yours for the taking.
So, when you see me, when you desire me, when you dream of me, and when you worry that perchance our differences are too great, see the God in me, and realize that nothing separates us at all.
That all you feel we ought to know about each other is written on our heavenly Father’s heart.