Is it the end? The ground beneath me is shaking. All around me every thing is folding in, the trees are shaking like dry twigs blown by the wind, the water is rising.
Now the waterline touches the sky line, and I am trapped in the midst of it all. The lightning is flashing furiously, my only ray of light. The noise is deafening, I cannot think straight. The tide is sucking me in, I am drinking so much water, my thoughts are running wild , but I am not ready to die, not yet, so I am fighting against nature, giving it all I have got.
I come up and out, only to be sucked in again, the tide is too high, the waves to brutal, I am blinded by the mixture of the sea and my tears, I can taste something salty, don’t know if it is my tears, my blood, or the sea. Right now I cannot tell one from the other.
I hear voices in my head, give up, let go, it’s okay, you have done the best you can. There’s another life after all, so let go already. My eyes dart about wildly, because I am not ready to die. I don’t care what the voices in my head say.
Oh dear, now my heart is beating so fast. How to be brave, what to do, how to come out of this one, I am short of ideas. So I squeeze my eyes tightly shut, telling myself that if the end is near, at least let it be gentle, let me not see it, feel it is inevitable, but I don’t want to see it.
Suddenly I hear someone laugh, opening one eye to take a peek, I realize there’s nobody.
Then it dawns on me, I am laughing at myself, because this is not me, I don’t give up easily, and wait a minute, my heavenly father reigns supreme over all creation, so this is definitely not the end.
Some days definitely feel so awful that there seems to be no hope, no solutions, no faith, with dark cast skies only, but looking deep within, there’s always the sound of laughter, and hope for tomorrow because he lives in me, so it is yet over.